In the flow (part one)

When we ask the questions of transformation the answers often come in the form of a new idea that may challenge the very structure on which we’ve built our life. For example when I read, “My happiness is a direct reflection of my level of faith in the Universe” ~Gabby Bernstein, two things simultaneously happened. First, I felt it in my body, I had a visceral reaction to the words, for a moment I softened the tight grip I often have on life. Second, my ego challenged it. The new information was in direct conflict with a story I tell that says “I’m not supported”. A story that constantly screams, “work harder, do more, you haven’t done enough to enjoy happiness”.

But it felt like truth so I sat with it to give my ego some time to catch up with this new information.

“My happiness is a direct reflection of my level of faith in the Universe” translates to me as, “I trust when I set an intention for; wealth, abundance, love, or the root of all intentions, happiness, and actively go after my dreams from a place of alignment (which means I believe I am worthy of the intention) the universe will support me, guide me”.

Esther Hicks says “there’s a stream of well being and it’s the only stream, you can allow it or you can resist it but it flows just the same”. I often think about my pushing against life with this analogy. Wherever you are right now close your eyes and imagine you are in a boat floating down a beautiful river. You trust the boat and the flow of the river so fiercely that you put away the oars and lie down to enjoy the scenery. Envision the landscape, trees, flowers, the blue sky, a floating cloud. Feel the rhythm and sway of the river, let it carry you, guide you.

How does it feel to let go like that? To let go of the need to control? To give yourself over to something bigger than you? Does it feel different? Scary? Unfamiliar? Or does it feel like the weight of the world was lifted off your shoulders? Allowing the river to guide us is the same as setting an intention, believing it, taking one small step toward it, and trusting that Universe will guide us in the direction of our dreams.

Trusting the river has not always been familiar to me. Habit is more like; set an intention, imagine the intention being made manifest, start to take a step in its direction then suddenly remember I’m human, incomplete and limited and have no idea how to get there and think “I can’t trust this boat or this river or sit back and enjoy this day”, then I grab the oars, turn the boat around and paddle upstream as hard as I can. Struggling against the river I say “I so desperately want this intention and look how hard I’m paddling to get it”. Not realizing that allowing it would be so much more powerful than fighting for it.

Feel yourself getting tired from paddling. There’s nothing more frustrating than watching the river going by and you battling to move upstream. As that frustration sinks in these limiting thoughts harden into beliefs that an easy life is for someone else but not for you. This is the state of resistance. The river is still flowing, our pushing against doesn’t stop beautiful things from happening, babies from being born or from two people falling in love, doesn’t stop laughter and fun and wellbeing but in our fight against we’ve temporarily cut ourselves off from this joy.

“A leaf does not resist the breeze. A goose does not resist the urge to fly down south. Is this not happiness? Is this not freedom? To access this incredible state, we need only one thing: Trust. Trust that, when you are not holding yourself together so tightly, you will not fall apart. Trust that it is more important to fulfill your authentic desires than listen to your fears. Trust that your intuition is leading you somewhere. Trust that the flow of life contains you, is bigger than you, and will take care of you - if you let it.” ~ Vironika Tugaleva